Note/L10N/Windfall/1.0/Books/WFCountJrnlE?
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10th of Rains Hand, 3E433<br>
Stilus! Brend! What have you done? My sons! Are you really trying to kill each other? Over a woman! How can this be? Alas, that is the situation, and it is up to me to solve it. But how? If these were just citizens of Windfall, I would just ban one from the city. But how can I do that to my own son? And which one? They both deserve it. Stilus was obviously wrong. He attacked his brother's wife. But does that make Brend right? Brend did try to kill Stilus. He even took several friends to help him, like it was some kind of fox hunt. Alas, I must bear some blame as well. I should have kept Acretia away from them when they were younger. I always knew she would come between them. Even as kids they would fight for her attention. I saw the way she would steal glances of one behind the other's back. She was always more interested in the one she didn't have at the time. I never should have allowed that marriage. But how could I refuse? Brend would have been heart broken. How could I do that to my son? Because I couldn't; I must exile the other. Brend was defending his wife's honor, just as I would have. Stilus on the other hand, I still cannot bring myself to say it. How could a son of mine do such a thing? I would never have believed it was possible of him. But if he didn't? Is it possible? Could Acretia be so cold that she would accuse an innocent man? NO! I can't believe that. I believe she would have given in to Stilus, if he had asked. Does it even matter at this point? Brend believes Stilus did it. If I do not separate those two, one of them will kill the other. I cannot allow that! Stilus will be exiled. Tomorrow Stilus will have to leave Varo lands. At least for now.<br>
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3rd of Second Seed, 3E433<br>
I have no enthusiasm since Stilus left. Still, there are things I must do. I do have a city to run. I will be heading to Windfall soon. Windfall, another problem that must be dealt with. I had planned to retire soon. Now I do not know if I can. Can I leave Windfall to Brend, without Stilus here to help him? That is one of the reasons for my trip. I need to know if Brend can handle the job. The land and the city are Brend's. He was first born, they are his birthrights. But Brend is too arrogant to run the city, he does not deal with people well. Brend probably thinks the city runs on it's own. I had Stilus running the day to day operations for me. And I have always expected Stilus would be Brend's right-hand man. Now what? I guess I shall find out soon enough. Brend will be joining me in Windfall shortly after I arrive. Then we will see what kind of leader he is.<br>
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8th of Mid Year, 3E433<br>
This darn cold, I just can't seem to get over it. It might be easier if I just took a couple of days rest. But how can I? Brend does not know the day to day operations of a city, and he isn't picking it up quickly either. I may have to continue running Windfall personally, and for some time to come. Brend could be a good leader, if he would learn to respect the commoners. Stilus had respect for the commoners, he just had difficulty making the tough decisions. Together they would have been perfect for Windfall. Without Stilus, I do not know if Brend will be able to effectively manage the city without alienating the peasants, or causing a riot. I will keep working with Brend. Hopefully, I can teach him enough to keep himself out of real trouble.<br>
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10th of Mid Year, 3E433<br>
I continue to get sicker and sicker. I am not getting any real rest here in Windfall. I have no choice, I will have to return to Varo Keep. I have reservations about leaving Brend alone to run Windfall. He is actually quite competent, even good at some aspects. But he just doesn't have any respect for the peasants. He cannot continue to treat them like animals. That is going to get him in trouble. The peasants will take only so much before there is some kind of backlash. Since Fracus will be coming with me to the Keep, I have asked Arcalius to keep an eye on Brend. Hopefully Arcalius will be able to keep Brend from making any serious mistakes.<br>
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22nd of Mid Year, 3E433<br>
I certainly do like being at the Keep better. It is far more relaxing. Maybe it is because Acretia has been waiting on me hand and foot since I have arrived. I know that cannot go on for too long. I have suggested that she go to Windfall and be with Brend. She keeps teasing me that she cannot leave me while I am sick.<br>
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26th of Mid Year, 3E433<br>
Acretia has left for Windfall this morning. At least she said she was going to Windfall. Her goodbye sounded more like an apology than a goodbye. The look in her eyes told a completely different story. As she talked I again found myself questioning Stilus' guilt. Could Acretia have lied about what happened with Stilus? Did I exile my son for no reason? I do believe I did. She never said so directly, but she did not have to. What have I done?<br>
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10th of Sunsheight, 3E433<br>
As I suspected, Acretia never made it to Windfall. Brend believes she was kidnaped or something. I do not believe Acretia will ever return to this area. Let Brend believe whatever he wants. I will not hurt him further by telling him the truth. At least not yet. I may have to, if I can find Stilus.<br>
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12th of Sunsheight, 3E433<br>
The end is near, I can tell. I have sent word to Brend, but I do not know if he will make it before I pass. I must get Brend my family's Signet Ring. It is the only way he will be able to prove he is my heir. Without it there is no telling who could challenge him for the right to govern Windfall. I have already dispatched most of my help, so I have Fracus helping me prepare everything. I had thought of sending the ring to Brend with Fracus, but I think it better that the ring stays here until Brend arrives. I am sure he will be here soon. I wish Stilus were here. I would like to apologize to him in person. I doubt I will be able to. I sent messengers, but I had no idea where to send them. If one of them finds Stilus, it will be pure luck.<br>
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12th of Sunsheight, 3E433<br>
If Brend or Stilus do not get here soon, I will not see them before I pass. I wish I could make peace between them and myself before I go. Alas, it does not appear that will happen.<br>
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Rains Handの10日、 3E433年<br>
Stilus！それにBrend！息子たちよ、何という事をしでかしてくれたのだ！？まさか兄弟同士、本気で殺し合うつもりなど無かろうな？しかも女の奪い合いだと？ああ！どうしてこんな酷い事に。わしが直々に解決せねばならないのか…。しかしどうやって？面倒事を起こしたのがWindfallの一般市民であれば追放するだけのことだが、自分の息子にそんな仕打ちなど出来ようか？それに、非があるのはどちらなのか？いいや、両方ともだ。Stilusの非は明白だ。兄弟の妻に手を出したのだからな。しかし、だからと言ってBrendは潔白だろうか？BrendはStilusを殺害しようとしたのだ。悪友たちの手を借りて。その様子はさながらキツネ狩りを楽しんでいるかのようだっと聞く。ああ、確かにわし自身にも責任がある。大人になる前にAcretiaを引き離しておくべきだったのだ。彼女がいつか兄弟の仲を引き裂く事をあらかじめ知ってさえいれば。息子たちはいつも、年端もゆかない頃から彼女の気を引こうと争っていた。彼女が兄弟のどちらか一方の背中ごしにもう片方を盗み見ていた事をわしは知っている。いつだってそうだった。片方を手に入れれば、手元にないもう片方が欲しくなる、そういう少女だった。あの子らの結婚は決して認めるべきではなかった。だが、わしに拒否権などあっただろうか？いや無理だ。もしそうなれば、きっとBrendは心に深い傷を負ってしまう。息子にそんなひどい仕打ちをするなど、わしには到底不可能だ。そう、出来ない。であればこそもう片方を勘当しなければならぬ。Brendはわしがそうであったように妻の名誉を守っていた。他方、Stilusは…。わしはまだ自分の口から伝える事が出来ないままでいる。何故わしの血を引いた息子がこのような真似を？彼にそんな暴挙を犯す事が可能とは信じられないでいる。だが、もしも彼に罪が無いとしたら？そんな事があり得るのか？Acretiaが無実の男を責められるような冷酷な性格だとでも？あり得ない！そんな事は信じられない。彼女の事だ。Stilusに強く言われたらきっと屈伏するはず。いや重要なのはそこだろうか？BrendはStilusに非があると信じている。わしの手で兄弟ふたりを引き離さねば、きっと殺し合いが始まってしまう。それだけは避けねばならぬ！やはり、Stilusを勘当しよう。明日にはVaro家の地所を離れさせなければ。少なくとも、事情が変わらぬ限りは。<br>
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Second Seedの3日、 3E433年<br>
Stilusが去ってからというもの、魂が抜けてしまったような気分が続いている。だがわしには義務がある。街の皆が待ってくれているのだ。なるべく早くWindfallに出向こう。Windfallにはもう一つ解決しなければならない問題がある。わしは早めに引退する予定だったが、今となってはそうも行っていられないようだ。Stilusの助けもなく、BrendだけでWindfallを治めてゆけるものだろうか？私は旅に出たが、その理由の一つがこれだ。Brendが立派に仕事をこなせるかどうかを見極めなければならぬ。土地も街もすべてBrendに任せる事になる。あの子は長男なのだから、当然の権利だ。しかしBrendは街を治めるにしては傲慢が過ぎる所がある。市民の扱いも下手だ。たぶんBrendは街を自分一人の力で治めているのだと思っているのだろう。そう言えばStilusにはわし自身の日々の仕事を手伝ってもらっていた。いつかStilusがBrendの右腕となって働いてくれる事を期待していたのに。それがこの体たらくとは！何にせよ、答えはきっとすぐに出る。わしがWindfallに到着してからBrendが合流するまでそう時間はかからぬだろう。これであの子の指導者としての資質も見極められる。<br>
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Mid Yearの8日、 3E433年<br>
寒気が止まらぬ。病魔と戦い続けるのも、もはや限界のようだ。たった2日ほどでも休暇を取ることが出来ればどんなに楽になれるだろうか？だがそれは許されぬことだ。Brendは街を統治する手腕を持ち合わせていないし、すぐに覚えてくれるとも思えない。ここしばらくの間はわし自らがWindfallを背負わなければならないだろう。Brendは良き指導者になり得る子だ。…庶民への思いやりを学んでくれさえすれば。思えばStilusは民への接し方を知っていた。しかしあの子には決断力が欠けていた。二人揃ってこそWindfallの統治は完全なものとなるのだ。BrendはStilusがいないままで良き統治者となれるだろうか？貧民を放逐したり暴動が起きたりはせぬだろうか？わしは当分Brendを支えるつもりだ。あの子が深刻なトラブルに見舞われる前に必要な事を教え込めれば良いのだが。<br>
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Mid Yearの10日、 3E433年<br>
日に日に病状は悪化しているようだ。なにせWindfallの街についてから休暇らしい休暇を一度も取っていないのだ。ああ、もはや選択の余地はない。Varo Keepへ戻らねば。Brendをここに一人きりで置いていくのが不安でないと言えば嘘になる。確かにあの子は有能で、優れた点もいくつかある。しかしただ一点、庶民への思いやりが決定的に足りない。今のまま庶民をまるで動物扱いするような振舞いを続ければ、きっと大変な事になってしまう。だからArcaliusにはBrendのお目付役になってもらった。Brendが取り返しのつかない失敗を犯す前にArcaliusが引き止めてくれる事を切に願う。<br>
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Mid Yearの22日、 3E433年<br>
Keepで過ごす日々はこの上なく快適だ。Acretiaがかいがいしく身の回りの世話をしてくれているのも大きい。だが、こんな事が長続きしない事は分かっているのだ。わしはWindfallに行ってBrendと暮らすよう言ったが、彼女はわしの体調が回復するまでここを離れないと言って聞かなかった。<br>
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26th of Mid Year, 3E433<br>
Acretia has left for Windfall this morning. At least she said she was going to Windfall. Her goodbye sounded more like an apology than a goodbye. The look in her eyes told a completely different story. As she talked I again found myself questioning Stilus' guilt. Could Acretia have lied about what happened with Stilus? Did I exile my son for no reason? I do believe I did. She never said so directly, but she did not have to. What have I done?<br>
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10th of Sunsheight, 3E433<br>
As I suspected, Acretia never made it to Windfall. Brend believes she was kidnaped or something. I do not believe Acretia will ever return to this area. Let Brend believe whatever he wants. I will not hurt him further by telling him the truth. At least not yet. I may have to, if I can find Stilus.<br>
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12th of Sunsheight, 3E433<br>
The end is near, I can tell. I have sent word to Brend, but I do not know if he will make it before I pass. I must get Brend my family's Signet Ring. It is the only way he will be able to prove he is my heir. Without it there is no telling who could challenge him for the right to govern Windfall. I have already dispatched most of my help, so I have Fracus helping me prepare everything. I had thought of sending the ring to Brend with Fracus, but I think it better that the ring stays here until Brend arrives. I am sure he will be here soon. I wish Stilus were here. I would like to apologize to him in person. I doubt I will be able to. I sent messengers, but I had no idea where to send them. If one of them finds Stilus, it will be pure luck.<br>
<br>
12th of Sunsheight, 3E433<br>
If Brend or Stilus do not get here soon, I will not see them before I pass. I wish I could make peace between them and myself before I go. Alas, it does not appear that will happen.<br>
<br>
