FormID: 030DB0AB bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6DSpiritMate0Nothing 1 Just kidding!
__ばかばかしい！
FormID: 030E1A65 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter 0 What?
__はぁ？
FormID: 030E1A65 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter 1 How is this possible?
FormID: 030E1A65 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter 2 Give it to me. Let me read it. And explain how you got it!
FormID: 030E1A66 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1 0 (For a moment Teshekru snarls, growls, then the corners of her mouth fall. Her eyes seem to look into a distant past, into another world. Their glow diminished, as if expirated.)
FormID: 030E1A66 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1 1 I don't have words strong enough to curse beings like Quurunae. If I could, I would have fed her her own still beating heart, but no one will give me this satisfaction.
FormID: 030E1A66 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1 2 Dagon's army, of which Quurunae was a part, brought so much pain and misery to Shade Perilous. In millennias the lakes of tears won't dry. Entire realms devastated. Kvatch is a joke in comparison.
FormID: 030E1A66 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1 3 And she even dared to touch sweet Deyanira's belongings! How could she?
FormID: 030E1A66 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1 4 No honor. No morale.
FormID: 030E1A66 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1 5 And now they even use the few memories of her to torment me. And torment those that matter to me today. I already lost her. Thrice. And now her heritage is used against me. Unbelieveable!
FormID: 030E1A67 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1A 0 Trying to pepper my wound with salt?
FormID: 030E1A67 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1A 1 I know what happened. I regret what I did. And I've payed dearly for it. A higher price than you can imagine.
FormID: 030E1A68 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1B 0 You don't know what happened back then. You see only a small little spotlight, frozen in time. Like a view through a window on a painting, picturing a scene of history.
FormID: 030E1A68 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1B 1 They use it against me. Quurunae, Karashivuel. Daedra whose whole purpose was destruction, and now they direct their anger and disappointment against me. Hypocrites.
FormID: 030E1A69 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1C 0 I know. Her sins are so easily forgotten. After all she merely murdered, pillaged, maimed, and tortured. Something easily forgotten. After all it was war.
FormID: 030E1A69 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter1C 1 While my doings were outside of any war. How easy you can pass judgement on such artificial constructs.
FormID: 030E1A6A bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2 0 Deyanira was drunk, and I lost control. I hadn't intended any of this.
FormID: 030E1A6A bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2 1 During my first millennias in Shade Perilous I mostly kept to myself. It was only a couple of hundred years ago that I dared to have an affair or two.
FormID: 030E1A6A bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2 2 Nothing I was emotionally involved in. A night spent with someone else, easily forgotten. That way I was able to restrain myself.
FormID: 030E1A6A bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2 3 Deyanira? I had a crush on her. For a long time. And then, as she, for an evening only, forgot about her dear Jaciel, oh well. Later I realized that she was drunk on Nocturnal's Magicka, and, how to explain?
FormID: 030E1A6A bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2 4 I messed everything up. Lost control. Exploited her situation. Tainted her sweet innocence. Twice I hurt her, brought shame onto myself. Twice.
FormID: 030E1A6B bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2A 0 I had intentions regarding her. Keep in mind this was more than a century ago.
FormID: 030E1A6B bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2A 1 She was everything I wanted to be. Everything I wanted to have.
FormID: 030E1A6B bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2A 2 And then, as the chance presented itself, I failed. Felt back into old habits, I wished I had overcome back then. I was wrong.
FormID: 030E1A6B bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2A 3 There is something you need to know about me. You must understand what I am.
FormID: 030E1A6C bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2B 0 Before that evening she became interested in me, too. In my kind.
FormID: 030E1A6C bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2B 1 She argued my case with her superiors, maybe even Nocturnal herself. And so more Seducers were allowed to live in Shade Perilous. Later some of them betrayed Nocturnal and joined Mehrunes Dagon.
FormID: 030E1A6C bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2B 2 Without their betrayal, I think the Nocturnals would have been able to hold Shade Perilous. She never forgave herself, and I felt as she sacrificed herself to the Void.
FormID: 030E1A6C bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2B 3 There is something you need to know about me. What I am. Why this all happened.
FormID: 030E1A6D bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2C 0 A night of closeness, of passion. Intermingling. Didn't happen. And why?
FormID: 030E1A6D bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2C 1 I thought I had overcome my old habits. I believed I wouldn't hurt anyone anymore. She payed the price for my misjudgment.
FormID: 030E1A6D bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2C 2 And then, as I had her in my arms, in her drunken hazyness, while she snuggled against my skin, I lost control. Fell back into darker times.
FormID: 030E1A6D bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2C 3 There is something you need to know about me. You must understand what I am.
FormID: 030E1A6E bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2D 0 Everything. I hoped to be closer to her for a long time. It's not only that I pushed her away from me, no, my crime was far more serious.
FormID: 030E1A6E bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2D 1 She lost something. Maybe even the will to continue her existence. Jaciel helped her, comforted her. Though as Jaciel was cornered by Dagon's forces, and she was on her own, she sacrificed herself to the Void.
FormID: 030E1A6E bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2D 2 Before I was trapped in the Soul Gem, I had a last remaining contact to Shade Perilous. Deyanira never returned from the Void. It shouldn't have taken her as long. I fear she was a victim to the madness and sickness that lurks in the Void.
FormID: 030E1A6E bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter2D 3 There is something you need to know about me. You must understand what I am.
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 0 How could Turumerin know that I was trapped? Haven't you asked yourself this question? Why did Karashivuel reacted a lot less favorably towards me than towards Velerya? Aren't you surprised by this?
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 1 I know the answer, as much as it ashames me.
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 2 The answer is simple. There's something akin to the Dremora's Clan Bound between us.
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 3 We aren't born, we don't have sisters and brothers. Yet as our existence began, we had certain alignments and positions in the spiritual and conceptual beginnings.
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 4 Those beginning alignments of me and Turumerin were very close together. I once was like her. Well, not exactly like her, but very, very similar.
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 5 Unlike her I wasn't content with what I was. I didn't join Sanguine, didn't indulge in my darkest desires. Instead I went to Nocturnal, to overcome the darkness inside me.
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 6 In this fateful moment with Deyanira habits I thought I had overcome long ago broke out again.
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 7 It must not happen again. I will not let it happen again!
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 8 Do you understand now? Why I long for your touch, but don't ask for it? Why I want to kiss you, but don't dare to do so? Why I want to embrace you, but only scuttle with my wings?
FormID: 030E1A6F bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3 9 I do not dare to go further, because I don't want to hurt you.
FormID: 030E1A70 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3A 0 Keep YOU safe, you mean?
FormID: 030E1A70 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3A 1 I apologize, I shouldn't make jokes about it. By keeping our distance, you're kept safe. As it should be. Losing you, after losing Deyanira through my urges, that I couldn't take.
FormID: 030E1A70 bgSQ6Tesh bgSQ6ELetter3A 2 Maybe, someday, I don't know. Oh well. Let's not dwell on it again.